Russell's funeral service

I was asked on Monday how on earth I must be feeling and coping, after all, Russell was my brother, but he was also my best friend. Well, that question probably cannot be answered in full right now, but I would to have a stab at it today and in some way describe what Russ meant to me.

In terms of losing your best mate, words fail me right now, but you'd get similar answers from a number of people, specifically Gethin, Jay, Paul Dixon, Jim and from his time in Kent, Michelle and Dave. Frankly though, I have not met anybody from this village or elsewhere who didn't feel Russell was their best mate, or at least they wish he had been! That's who my brother was, friend to all, best friend to most.

The most powerful emotion I have when I think about my brother is pride. Pride which can only be felt, words do not exist which describe this feeling accurately enough. I am proud of the things he achieved, in sports as everybody knows - from his first kick in the garden and his first match at little league when he joined my team, to becoming the youngest club cricket captain in Newdigate's history! He was the best at everything he did.

But proud mostly because of his values and beliefs as a person. A true gentleman, Russ was honest, extremely loyal and so modest about the things he was so clearly brilliant at. He was somebody for whom nothing was too much trouble, or time to precious to give. He was the kind of person everybody wished they could be. I am encouraged by the fact I will take Russ with me wherever I go, he'll constantly be in my thoughts and he'll inspire me to be the person I want to be from here - which is more like him.

I can say 100% that I have no regrets about our time together. There are no unanswered questions, nothing I wish I had said to him which I didn't, no feeling I wish I had made clearer. I think the closest we ever came to having an argument was when discussing the merits of Ranieri's tinkering, or whether its John Terry or Frank Lampard on the team sheet first!

He died knowing exactly how I feel about him, and I am blessed with knowing how he felt about me - we both thought each other was our hero, the one person you could turn to when the going got tough, but the one who you tried hard to be like too. In a way, I am comforted by the fact he went before me, because I couldn't bear the thought that I had put him through the pain I am feeling now - as some of you will know, he was a soppy sod at the best of times!

I will forever be grateful to our mother, Jackie and our father, Chris for producing THE finest human being imaginable and allowing me the chance to have the brother I couldn't wish to change in any way, and I know I speak for our sisters Lorien and Stephanie when I say that. He did us ALL proud.

So for now Russ, although I could go on forever - I simply want you to know that it has been a privilege being your brother, and I'll see you when I see you matey.